Many of you may have read my entry, “The Truth About This Website.”
That entry was a crisis of character and a turning point for me. It brought to a head an internal battle I’ve been fighting ever since I started this site. I wrote that article almost two weeks ago and I’ve been silent ever since. I’ve been evaluating things and deciding where to go from here. Yesterday I made some decisions and changes.
One, I starting a second website devoted to inner growth especially as it relates to domestic violence, an issue I have a lot of experience with.
Two, I am changing the tone of this site. Morally, I have a conflict with recommending expensive wedding items when I know there are much more affordable options out there. If I were to label my spending habits, I would call myself an “elegant tightwad.” My wedding budget was less than $3,000. Even if I had the resources to spend more, I don’t think I would have. In fact, my advise to anyone would be to do it as inexpensively as you can and use the rest of the money to get out of debt or buy a house. That is being a wise steward. That is one of the principles I live by.
To me, tightwaddery is a game. I have fun finding the rock bottom price I can spend and still be satisfied with the outcome. Amy Daczyzcn, the author of The Tightwad Gazette, defines thrift as using creativity instead of money to meet our goals. I like that definition. It doesn’t mean being “cheap.” There is a huge difference between thrifty and cheap. Cheap is finding the least expensive option – period. Thrifty is finding the least expensive way reach your goal. For example, my wedding dress was an $800 designer gown that I found on clearance for $99. Now I suppose I could have gotten a less expensive dress. I could have worn an off-the-rack formal gown and saved $30 or $40. But I would have been compromising. Part of my dream wedding was the dress. I felt like a million bucks wearing an $800 dress and – until today – very few people knew how little I actually paid for it. That is the essence of tightwaddery. If everyone knows your bouquet was $10 or less by its appearance, it’s cheap. If nobody has a clue you only spent $10 on your bouquet, it’s elegantly frugal.
In hindsight, this crisis was actually a normal part of the growing process for any blog. I knew I wanted to write about wedding planning from a Christian perspective but I wasn’t quite sure what my voice was going to be. I confess I tried being what I thought people wanted to hear. That never works. I have to express who I am through this blog or it will never last.
So instead of giving “expert wedding advice from a Christian perspective,” I am going to share with you how I put together my wedding, how to think like an elegant tightwad and, of course, spiritual insights. In fact, a big part of my focus is going to be on creating a meaningful wedding. I am really excited about the focus I have found for this site.
A wedding is an important rite of passage and a grand celebration. It deserves all of the pomp, circumstance and tradition it is bestowed. At the same time, we don’t have to break the bank to achieve our dreams.
Over the next few days, I’ll be rereading and potentially revising all of my posts up to this point. Once that is done, I will begin adding new articles that truly reflect who I am and what’s important to me.
